should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
