we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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