some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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