I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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