There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
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