FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
