They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
