i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
They are going to name an STD after you.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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