when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
