we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
