we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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