There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize