I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
