Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
