god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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