white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
