i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
