he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
So. Much. Porn.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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