your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
