My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
