I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
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