Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
