my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
He did a backflip because drugs
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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