This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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