Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
