is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
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