I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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