absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
