No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
