ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
