belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
