gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
