OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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