conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
so much tequila, so little girl.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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