Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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