umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i drank out of a bidet.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I'm always down for nudity.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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