I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize