If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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