That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
