I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
