Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
