I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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