After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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