I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
