Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Sorry about my life...
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
