No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize