there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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