Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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