There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
