Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
