Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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